Monday, September 8, 2014

TV Column: “German-web-check”: ARD makes the train down – and the … – ABC Online

Monday, 09.08.2014, 23:24 · FOCUS-Online-author Carin Pawlak
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The ARD-check is: At Deutsche Bahn is much” inscrutable “,” fined “and” exaggerated “. Positive results are omitted consistently. The company does not shrink on a model train size.

The web-bashing, it is so socially compliant as to boycott fur in some, the word “negro” for to keep politically-correct and to be for world peace. So of course it is not surprising that the ARD-check can shrink the transport company on a model train size. Anything else would probably cause a shitstorm.

trains on the “quiet chair”

The Billy shelf, the igloo-fish – and so now the web. The ARD as Supernanny. With heavy moralizing. And the reaction is always appropriate for children, alone in the language. “And then it goes, right !, in the train”, it moderated Kika-standard out from the off, when the reporter sets out to work.

missing is that trains must go to the “quiet chair”. First of all voices but, properly !, in the pedestrian zone, collected. But who would it be against the conventional wisdom? Eben. So: The German Railway’s too late, too expensive, too dirty.

In five minutes, the cheapest ticket

The very first test is annoying because unrealistic. Testers are intended to solve a ticket from Dusseldorf to Gütersloh at the vending machine. But of course, not just any, but the best. Five minutes is this time. Since it is already happening times. How should someone create in five minutes before departure mean?

From the “usual conditions” is heard. Sure, if someone is planning a train journey, he is five (in Section 5) minutes prior to the trip to the vending machine to buy a ticket. That the customer then, in all Verpeiltheit, does not take the cheapest ticket is just normal.

you have to wait. Oh!

For quite abnormal, it keeps the ARD team, if customers have to wait in train travel center. “You must wait,” says the voiceover. Oh! That no red carpet was rolled out to the switch, is surprisingly not a shortcoming.

But this was a web consultant “very distant and not warm,” as one tester notes. Had the employees to embrace and kiss the customers? The ratio for ARD-check is now also increasingly distanced from the viewers’ perspective.

If one train, it’s not too late

It is true of course that the German train pretty tricks when it comes to punctuality. The announcement that 95 percent of all trains have less than six minutes late, so wrong. Because is not counted when a train traveler about his connecting train not make and therefore must depend on a railway station one hour.

Also not calculated: If a train fails, it is not considered late, but just falls out of the statistics. As a result, so only 76 percent of the trains are late. “Beautified” is the first.

Without flushing, with beer can

Yes, an ICE loses him before. Because a track is wrongly put. The toilets are cleaner than feared, but on two of five salads were discovered too many intestinal bacteria.

But what is also important to know: Many traveler considers it seems to be normal, not to operate the rinse after the toilet-gear and the beer can be let near the sink. For this, the web can for once nothing.

The train comes. But not so fast

And then: The train comes, at some point, but not so fast. It is true that the company has closed down many sidings for cost reasons, as some sections are not repaired, so the trains then just not rushing to go with 200 kilometers per hour, but often times have to cut up to 20 kilometers per hour.

But what is technically on ARD check again unclean: The test driver who must leave their car for two weeks to take the train, reported only from the disadvantages. She praises her travel time by car 35 minutes that would last the train, however, up to one and a half hours.

What course does not say that they certainly sometimes stands with the car in a traffic jam and deviates from its best. This would of course not so well fitted to train bashing.

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